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Friday, September 1st, 2006 10:18 pm
I'm feeling silly. My roommate has a copy of Poolhall Junkies, which just watched for our movie night, and I'm going to grade it, category by category. Everything's on a scale from one to ten, with references for each category. (Obscure references, admittedly, but I have eclectic tastes.)

First, the technical categories.

Plot: Does it make sense? Is it complex? Is there a definite forward motion to it?
If Rescue from Gilligan's Island is a 1 (trust me, it is) and Hard Rain is a 9, Poolhall Junkies is a 8. Yes to all three questions.

Acting: Does it convey emotion and character?
If Keanu Reeves in The Matrix gets a 3 and Lee J. Cobb in 12 Angry Men gets a 10, then Poolhall Junkies gets a 7. But I'm not a great judge.

Visuals: How good does it look onscreen? How are the special effects?
If Catwoman gets a 2 and Zathura gets a 9, Poolhall Junkies gets a solid 6. Nothing breathtaking, but steady servicable work.


Then, the qualitative categories.

Morality: Does it promote - as in, suggest is desirable - delinquency? Sadism? Sin?
If Stark Raving Mad is a 4 and Pieces of April is a 9, Poolhall Junkies is a 7. Definitely questionable stuff happening, but it's clearly portrayed as such.

Propriety: Could you show it to your 6-year-old? Your 16-year-old?
If Fight Club is an unquestionable 1 and Disney's The Kid is a 9, then Poolhall Junkies is a 2. These guys walk into a room and sailors start running out, but no-one gets shot on screen.

Cool: Does it have neat scenes? Great lines?
If The 39 Steps is a 2 and Serenity is a 9, Poolhall Junkies is a 5. The pool is absolutely stunning – if you're a fan of pool – and there's not too much else shiny.



Overall, though? I give this one a 8.5. Not a classic, but definitely choice.
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